North Brooklyn Marriage & Family Therapy

My wife abused me. She was violent and threatened suicide all the time. I held her in my arms and chatted with the suicide hotline wondering what I should do. I finally got her into therapy. I had to threaten divorce, and didn't speak to her for a couple days. Her behavior was scary. We got therapy here, individually, but they wouldn't see us together because of the violence in the relationship. And they, or she, convinved herself I was abusive. Never laid a hand on her. Had to cover my bruises when I went to work a few times. She was not a citizen and she found out if she was a "victim" of DV it would streamline her green card process. Truly loved her and hope she's doing well. Ruined my life though. I had to move far away from the place I called home the first 33 years of my life. Stay far away from this place.

My partner and I finished our second session and immediately turned to each other to ask if the therapist had really just said that we a genuinely happy couple trying to strengthen our relationship may not be right for one another, while simultaneously implying that "boys will be boys" so boundaries should be overlooked? I'll be needing to see a new therapist just to get over this one. Maybe it could be chalked up to inexperience but I certainly don't think counseling should do more harm than good.

My first marriage counselor was very good, but moved away. We returned a year later and were assigned a counselor in training who often commented on the future state of the marriage if we didn’t do xyz thing she advised. The last time we went, we both felt more bleak about the future than we did going in and we mutually agreed not to return to her. When I asked for a new counselor, I was told there was no availability after being given a bit of a runaround. We have a new, more experienced counselor that has been much more effective and who explained that the approach our previous counselor took was judgmental and untrained. I would not recommend.